Teagan at the Fork – SHANNON BRINKMAN
After a very difficult month in our sport, I do believe we have all – in our own way- reflected on WHY we do what we do. And I hope those who do not have an answer for that question, reconsider their motives and actions.
This weekend I was reminded why I do what I do – it is the small victories. It is the tiny moments of triumph found among a sea of challenges. It is this weekend, in the heat of 95 degrees, at a horse show I had originally (and perhaps naively) planned on moving my young horse up to do our first preliminary, entered in her 8th training level, finishing with 5 time penalties in show jumping and 10 time penalties on XC – and being very, very happy with my result.
Because last week I could not jump a fence to the right without her trying to buck me off. My horse is a great jumper. So great in fact that she jumps the jump, and then in midair double barrel kicks over the standards; usually when she is mad, (tik would tell me she isn’t mad – so I will correct myself) Usually when she is feeling too much pressure – a bad distance, bad form on my part, a bad line, if the poles are too white, if the poles are too black, if Donald Trump is up in the polls, you get the drift. Usually it is hilarious because you know exactly why she is doing it when she does it. (flash back to a jump lesson in florida on the wet grass, when Teagie slipped the stride before a vertical down a hill, my last words were “oh, god!” as she attacks the take off, grunts her double barrel over the (2’6″ mind you) vertical, lands in an angry heap, bucks left – i fall right, bucks right, i fall left, bucks straight – I am on her neck, and then she stops and i crawl back into the saddle, turn around at the entire team sitting there staring in horror….an sinead just mutters “you just fell off like 5 times…”/flashback)
But last week in our first jump school back from our bobble at Fair Hill, I was unclear of what was wrong. And I had no eyes on the ground. So I did what any mature professional horseman would do, ended on jumping 10 crossrails well, and then started crying and went on a hack, thinking about how much I should market the horse for.
I had already gotten through this problem last year, why was it here again? And worse!? She was SO good at the Fork but at our last outing in April, I had retired her in a fairly simple show jump round-due to an uncharacteristic stop at the A element of the in and out. These bumps were pretty damaging to my ego, and I had decided that maybe Teagan was not the right horse for me, and maybe she would prefer a different life with a different rider in a different discipline.
Spinning, Spiraling…off the deep end.
I knew I needed help, lots of help. Which -thankfully – my ego is not too big to admit that! Help!!! So much help…. Lessonnssss allll the lessons!
I needed to find a solution, make a plan, I need someone to tell me I need to back away from the ledge, or just bloody step off and get on with it.
So after sending carrier pigeons, text messages, hand written pleas to Sinead she traveled to Hart Farm two days in a row to help me. My jump lesson consisted of creating a very black and white plan to apply to jumps one at a time. It was hard for both Teagan and me to be consistent, and that is what we were working on. I wanted to jump a course at height and school until I felt comfortable, but we jumped 2 different jumps – one small vertical, and one small oxer, in both directions until I understood how to use my new plan.
I went to the horse show- SCARED. Not scared of the horse show, but scared on having an awful ride. My horse was so tense all day, even in the 100 degree heat. But she stayed rideable, when previously she would have been going every direction but straight. I had to jump 20 jumps in the warm up until I felt comfortable with my plan. Until I felt that she was listening and that she wouldn’t over jump in the ring. It takes the time it takes! And thankfully, the SJ stewards were super patient and did not rush me in the slightest (THANK YOU FLORA LEA) even though I was the last rider in the division and the only person in warm-up.
I went into the ring not really sure how it was going to go, but we went – and we went slow. Slow is not something we do well. I have never been so excited to go slow in my life. I was most worried about the vertical to vertical one stride down a hill . Exercises like this that promote more careful jumping is usually what we struggle the most with. But she stayed patient, and although she definitely double barreled over the in, she did not bowl through the out and stayed on her line to the next fence. I felt her finally take a breath for the first time that day after jump 8 (there were only 9 jumps). But THAT was my victory. THAT small relief of tension and a soft, close distance to the final oxer was my happy moment. I decided maybe I would take her off the market then. 😉
At this point in my journey with Teagan – I was hoping to be winning and having people offer me obscure amounts of cash for her as she showed off her ridiculous medium trot around the warm-up. Instead I checked back into reality and realize I have bought an amazing and talented horse, with 9/10 movement, 10/10 jumping, 10/10 bravery, and 67/10 green.
I am super independent, and super motivated, but I know for a fact I cannot raise this child on my own. Without Sinead’s help last week, and honestly without the patience of the show jump stewards and Debbie telling me to take my time, I would not have gotten through this weekend with a smile on my face, and with a foundation set for the next move. I immediately texted Sinead and Lynn Symansky to tell them I had time penalties show jumping (something that Donner and Grey Area sometime have because they also are super bold jumping horses) perhaps a little ridiculous because these horses are going 4 and 2 star, and my horse is going training level, but I felt like a big kid on my big fancy horse none the less.
Onto the next victory!
Other Notable Victories of this weekend:
THE EXECUTIVE PUMPKIN finishing a solid 6th place in her first training level !!!! So Awesome!
and the most exciting news – Kasey Callanan who has been working very hard with her horse Melba – had their first double clear SJ and double clear XC TO DATE! SO SO SO PROUD!!!!
(Also, TOMMY the perfect pony finished 2nd with Kristin and Lacey ALMOST won on both her horses …. #whoops – and Daphne and Anakin are back and better than ever at the level!!- so many great victories this weekend!)
#FLORALEA
#HOTASHAITI
#TRAININGLEVELSTRING
#DIDNTGETELIMINATEDORBUCKEDOFF
#YAY
